Week 64: Manly Taste & Ant Cakes

Thursday, May 4, 2017
Location: Birchbox (SoHo)
Event: BirchboxMan 5-Year Birthday Bash
Food: Grilled cheese

BirchboxMan, which is apparently a thing, was celebrating its fifth year of existence. Melt Shop supplied grilled cheese sandwiches which was a big step up from the tiny bowl of candy that was served at the last Birchbox thing I went to. Now we all get to keep waiting patiently for the subscription business model to die off.

Saturday, May 6, 2017
Location: Banana Republic (Midtown)
Event: Banana Republic Summer Collection
Food: Cupcakes

For some reason ant sized cupcakes have become of staple of the free food scene. Maybe they think I won't eat as much if the food is miniature but that is simply not true. Banana Republic served up a large display of these offensive cupcakes so I ate four and didn't even pretend to shop. 

Week 63: Old Tricks & New Tarts

Tuesday, April 25, 2017
Location: WeWork (Times Square)
Event: Amp Your Apps! Powering Revenue with First Party Publisher Data
Food: Savory Pastries

WeWork stuck to it's typical repertoire by hosting an event about data/mobile/Internet stuff that mostly befuddled attendees. But they did upgrade from their typical vegetable platter to a selection of savory pastries so the whole thing was basically bearable.

6 meals in April // $30 donated to Food Bank For New York City

Week 62: Pops & Portraits

Thursday, April 20, 2017
Location: Joseph Gross Gallery (Chelsea)
Event: The Art of POP: An Ode to Andy Warhol
Food: Champagne popsicle

Trying to prove that adding alcohol to something is always a good idea, FrutaPOP has created boozy ice pops. They took over a Chelsea art gallery to show weird portraits of Andy Warhol and induce brain freezes. They even had a live band that did not take kindly to Missy Elliott requests.

Week 61: Town Halls & Wedding Bells

Monday, April 3, 2017
Location: Roulette (Boerum Hill)
Event: Roulette's Spring Neighborhood Open House
Food: Beans, rice, edible spoon

This event would have been perfect for planning my nonexistent upcoming wedding. Various caters served up their best offerings, a live band played, and I even got to experience the awkward mingling my guests would endure. And in the most exciting moment since I found out about bread bowls, I experienced my first hor d'oeuvre served on an edible spoon.

Wednesday, April 5, 2017
Location: St. John's Lutheran Church (Greenpoint)
Event: 94th Precinct Community Council Meeting
Food: Donut

If you are nostalgic for conservative small-town politics, head over to the 94th Precinct's Community Board meeting in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. You can recall the Pledge of Allegiance from third grade and enjoy a delicious Peter Pan blueberry muffin-esque donut in the basement of a church. Progressives beware, but if you're interested in opening a bar in the neighborhood, it might be best for you to show your face.

—Guest roach Alyson

Thursday, April 6, 2017
Location: Cornell University ILR
Event: The Maker Movement
Food: Shrimp , avocado toast, mushroom

Cornell ILR school hosted another event on the future of work. This talk focused on the maker movement, which I guess just describes people with useful hobbies, unlike my foray into collecting coins. My overall takeaway was that I should probably get back into shrinky dinks.

Week 60: Good Food & Good People

Wednesday, March 29, 2017
Location: Essex Street Market (LES)
Event: Food for Good: How Nonprofits are Creating Change Through Food
Food: Cookies

Essex Street Market hosted local food businesses that are doing good for the community. From a food truck run by former convicts to a girls club teaching cooking skills, they all had inspiring stories and impressive results. LES Girls Club and Reconnect Brooklyn also provided some delicious baked goods to help us all break our Lenten promises.

8 meals in March // $40 donated to Food Bank For New York City

Week 59: Sushi & Spring

Monday, March 20, 2017
Location: Sony Square (Flatiron)
Event: Innovation. Technology. Design: A Panel Discussion on Sony's Product Design
Food: Sushi

While Sony isn't as cool as they were back in the Walkman days, they serve sushi at their events now so I'm a believer. Three sleek looking Japanese men presented on the Sony design philosophy while I drank wine and sat on a stuffed cube. They couldn't get the videos in their presentation to load which is sort of ironic, but seems to be a common theme at most tech companies.

Monday, March 20, 2017
Location: Dairy Queen (Union Square)
Event: Free Cone Day
Food: Soft serve

New York City is tragically lacking in Dairy Queen locations, but I made my pilgrimage to the only one in Manhattan for free cone day. DQ celebrated the first day of spring by handing out soft serve and testing the limits of their employees' patience in dealing with freeloaders.

Week 58: Big Ladies & Small Cakes

Wednesday, March 15, 2017
Location: UNIFORM (Midtown)
Event: Badass Babes Panel & Party with Ann Shoket
Food: Cupcake

Ann Shoket, the former editor of Seventeen magazine, hosted a panel of inspiring women working in NYC. They had a wealth of advice on staying focused, being a good boss, and even some dating tips. The personalities were big, but the cupcakes were small. I'm still holding out hope that someday I will encounter a feminist event that is brave enough to serve full size cupcakes.

Week 57: Crime & Cereal

Tuesday, March 7, 2017
Location: Grand Central (Midtown)
Event: Ben & Jerry's Cereal Splashback
Food: Frozen Flakes Ice Cream

Ben & Jerry's decided to made cereal only slightly more unhealthy by adding ice cream to it. They celebrated National Cereal Day by introducing three flavors inspired by everyone's favorite breakfast dessert. Their setup in Grand Central included a giant ball pit, which is the kind of thing I would literally never do in public.

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Sunday, March 12, 2017
Location: The VYNL (East Village)
Event: Social Sunday Pop-Up
Food: Cookie squares

For unknowable reasons, this event had a very long line to get it. It was basically a flea market with various vendors selling not immediately useful things. They also had cookies laid out on the table which were free unless I stole them.

Week 56: Feminists & Freelancers

Thursday, March 2, 2017
Location: Cornell University ILR
Event: The Global Gig Economy: Choice or Necessity?
Food: Fruit, crackers, cheese

Usually events involving Ivy League schools and reputable consulting firms find legitimate reasons to exclude me, but I somehow slipped through the cracks. McKinsey Consulting presented their report on the gig economy hosted by the Cornell ILR School. Apparently about 30% of people do this type of independent work and they're happier than the rest of us with dumb regular jobs.

Saturday, March 4, 2017
Location: Barnard College
Event: Haptic Bodies: Perception, Touch, and the Ethics of Being
Food: Sandwich, salad, pasta salad

What is the smell of resistance? This was perhaps the least weird question posed at the Haptic Bodies talk, which was part of Barnard's annual Scholar and Feminist Conference. I got to revisit my all girls school roots and wander around Barnard desperately hoping that my face still looks 19 (it does not). We also got to chat with an adorable quilter who was featured in an accompanying art installation and was basically the second grandma we all want.

Week 55: Politics & Posers

Our new guest roach this week is Alyson. This Barnard grad can be found social working around and getting a stellar return on her unlimited metro card. Her interests include kickboxing, saying she's going to knit you a hat, and dead Tejano singers. She eats free to support ACLU.

Wednesday, February 22, 2017
Location: Union Temple of Brooklyn (Prospect Heights)
Event: 9th District of Brooklyn Town Hall Regarding Trump's First 30 Days
Food: Donuts

Trying to be a politically aware and active millennial in Brooklyn is no easy feat. Especially when there are 1,500 other like-minded people trying to get into the same Jewish temple to engage and listen to Congresswoman Yvette Clarke's town hall presentation and discussion. The struggle of a roach never felt so real. Thank the universe there were piles of donuts, brownies, cookies, blondies, and coffee available for the masses to nosh while writing a very thought-provoking and strongly worded postcard to the 45th president, who shall remain unnamed. 

—Alyson

Thursday, February 23, 2017
Location: NYU School of Law (Greenwich Village)
Event: Run for Something: Helping Progressives Under 35 Run for Office
Food: Pizza

NYU Law Democrats hosted an event to encourage progressives under 35 to run for political office. I got to pretend to be an NYU Law student for the night, which is a lot safer than that time I pretended to be a pilot. They also served pizza, which is a political candidate I can get behind.

6 meals in February // $20 donated to Food Bank For New York City // $10 donated to LA Food Bank // $10 donated to ACLU

Week 54: Sneaky Treats & Social Meets

Monday, February 13, 2017
Location: Rizzoli Bookstore (Flatiron)
Event: The Virtuous Tart Book Launch
Food: Caramel candy

Perhaps trying to steal the throne from sneaky chef Jessica Seinfeld, Susan Jane White wrote a cookbook about making desserts from healthy ingredients. White was on-hand to answer questions and give out samples of her nutritious treats— though this just happened to be the last thing I ate before I got a gallstone lodged in my bile duct so my recommendation of her recipes as a healthy lifestyle choice is half-hearted at best.

Wednesday, February 15, 2017
Location: Marvallure (Pasadena)
Event: Social Media Workshop
Food: Salami, cheese, veggies, and chocolate

Anything involving clothes and other women business owners you can count me in! I am terrible at social media so it was really awesome to meet with other women business owners. I got really helpful hints! #womensupportingwomen

—Guest roach Lauren

Week 53: Sugar & Sugar

Saturday, February 11, 2017
Location: Aerie SoHo Pop-Up (SoHo)
Event: U-Day Love
Food: Sugar cookies

Shockingly I wasn't cool enough to shop at American Eagle when I was at an appropriate age to do so, but now I'm making up for lost time. Aerie was having a Valentine's Day pop-up complete with those inedible message hearts and sugar cookies. I got to make my own to-go bag of goodies and avoid social interaction completely.

Week 52: Apps & Shacks

Saturday, February 4, 2017
Location: Shake Shack (Midtown West)
Event: Launch of Shake Shack App
Food: ShackBurger

Though more expensive and less delicious than In-N-Out, Shake Shack is about as good as it gets for fast food burgers in NYC. And now with a new app that lets you order ahead, gone are the days of paying me to wait in line for you at Madison Square Park. Better yet, the first ShackBurger you order through the app is free—a very convincing argument to get vegetarian friends to abandon their values.

9 meals in January // $35 donated to Food Bank For New York City // $20 donated to LA Food Bank

Week 51: Smart Cities & Smart Ladies

Tuesday, January 24, 2017
Location: Grand Central Tech (Midtown)
Event: Smart Cities NYC '17 January Town Hall
Food: Fruit and cheese

I love going into buildings with lots of security and turnstiles because I need constant affirmation that my fashion choices don't make me look homeless. I successfully made it into this office near Grand Central for an event called Smart Cities which is just vague enough to mean absolutely nothing. After spending 40 minutes there I was no closer to answer, but I ate a lot of kiwi.

This week we welcomed our first guest roach, Lauren. She's best known for ruling over a school uniform empire, but is also referred to affectionately as a dog mom, a conquistadora, and a cry baby. She lives in LA and spends her days searching for a pet turtle that went missing 5 years ago. She eats free to support LA Food Bank.

 

Thursday, January 26, 2017
Location: Stride - A Running Studio (Pasadena, CA)
Event: Grand Opening
Food: Vegetables, meatball, cake pop

I am so obsessed with this studio that I will do anything involved with it, including attending it's grand opening by myself! When I think about it, I don't think I've really attended anything solo or without knowing someone. It really pushed me out of my comfort zone to be honest. The three women who own this business remembered my name from the classes, so that was kind of awesome!

—Lauren

Friday, January 27, 2017
Location: Regal Cinema LA Live (Downtown LA, CA)
Event: Women in Sports Business Panel
Food: Croissant, blueberry muffin, fruit, yogurt

Well ..... I am not a woman in sports. So the networking was a little weird, but one of the women I met worked for the Ducks and answered all my questions regarding ice. (I am SUPER awkward!)  I really enjoyed seeing Phoebe Halliwell (aka Alyssa Milano ... are you a Charmed Fan?) and Angela Ruggiero, 4 time hockey Olympian. My takeaway: Work Hard, Be Fearless!

—Lauren

Week 50: Bitcoins & Breakfast

Tuesday, January 17, 2017
Location: Spitzberg Partners (SoHo)
Event: How Creating Great User Experiences Can Drive Blockchain Adoption
Food: Salami, bread, cheese, Cornichon pickle

I can definitively say that even after spending 2 hours at this event I still have no idea what it was about. I think it vaguely involved Bitcoin, a currency which I feel slimy even giving the respect of a capital letter to. The good news is they served Cornichon pickles and Italian meats which is basically what I would choose for my last meal.

Thursday, January 19, 2017
Location: Creamline (Chelsea)
Event: Grand Opening
Food: Deep fried Oreo

Sometimes when you're an adult you can choose to start the day by eating a deep fried Oreo. Fast casual spot Creamline was giving them away for free to celebrate the opening of their new location and to help me expand my preconceived notions of what breakfast should be. I ate my Oreo and then ordered some oatmeal just in case people thought I was a maniac.

Week 49: Savory Scones & Octogenarian Outings

Monday, January 9, 2017
Location: Grey Art Gallery (Greenwich Village)
Event: Inventing Downtown: Artist-Run Galleries in New York City
Food: Pretzels

It never ceases to amaze me that the octogenarians of the city are able to make it out to cultural events in droves. The opening at NYU's Grey Art Gallery was no exception. The place was fully packed so it was hard to see the art, but I did get an intimate sampling of what kind of perfume everyone was wearing. I also got to witness a heated argument between two attendees about not using your hands to grab pretzels from the bowl.

Wednesday, January 11, 2017
Location: Jing Fong (Chinatown)
Event: Complimentary Peking Duck Night
Food: Peking duck

In order to make up for all the time I've had to wait in line for dim sum at Jing Fong, I took advantage of my third complimentary Peking duck as a loyal e-mail list subscriber. They always put a placard with my name on the table which makes my ego soar with joy. And to top it all off, somehow the five us were able to finish an entire birthday cake. Live your joy.

Saturday, January 14, 2017
Location: ThoughtWorks (Chelsea)
Event: Action Item Fair
Food: Spinach scone

Little known fact: I'm very into savory scones. Action Item Fair started the day off right with breakfast before hosting a series of talks and workshops on how to take a more active role in politics and the causes we care about. I got to learn from activist Zakiyah Ansari about how to set up effective meetings with elected officials. She not only had an inspiring story but also a dope sense of style.

Week 48: Dark Laughter & Light Shame

Thursday, January 5, 2017
Location: The Gaf West (Hell's Kitchen)
Event: Bomb Shelter Comedy Show
Food: Pizza

The Gaf West hosted a night of amateur comedy in their windowless basement, aptly titled the Bomb Shelter Comedy Show. It was very dark down there which made it even more mortifying when my flash went off while trying to take a cute picture of my free pizza during one of the comedian's sets. Luckily everyone was too distracted trying to decide whether to laugh at the possibly funny jokes.

2016 In Review

In 2016, I decided to commit myself to something I've been unofficially practicing for years: eating free food. I'm not only cheap but also have incredibly low standards for what I'll put in my body so it seemed like the perfect New Year's resolution. 

I scoured the Internet, joined mailing lists, and bothered friends to find all the events so unloved they had to bribe attendees with free food. There were hackathons, comedy shows, movie screenings, and one very awkward award ceremony that I accidentally crashed. And for every fellow New Yorker that offered me free food, I donated $5 to Food Bank for New York City.

Throughout the year I attended 91 different events. It was an honor to get a brief glimpse into some of the many communities that call New York City home—from the francophiles of the Alliance Française to the amateur comedians at Bunga's Den to the camera whizzes at AbelCine.  I was humbled by the inclusiveness I felt by each of them even as a self-proclaimed pest and outsider.

New York, thank you for putting up with this roach. See you in 2017.

  • 91 events attended
  • $455 (2,275 meals) donated to Food Bank for New York City
  • 15 slices of pizza
  • 11 cheese plates
  • 1 Peking duck

See the map below for all the places I visited in 2016.

Week 47: Awkward Chats & Ugly Sweaters

Monday, December 19, 2016
Location: Betaworks (Meatpacking)
Event: New York Data Science Ugly Sweater Mixer
Food: Vegetables, cheese, grapes

Perhaps you've heard of the New York Data Science Ugly Sweater Mixer. Just kidding, no one has. It was a nice mix of socially awkward people and people clearly there just for free food so I fit in on both accounts.

6 meals in December // $30 donated to Food Bank For New York City

Week 46: Fancy Ice Cream & Famous Pudding

Wednesday, December 14, 2016
Location: Gansevoort Market (Meatpacking)
Event: Grand Opening
Food: Big Gay Ice Cream

Gansevoort Market is one of those bougey indoor food halls that seems to serve exclusively poke bowls and arepas. To celebrate their new location, they were giving out free samples from vendors. While I'm normally more of an Ample Hills girl, I couldn't resist the shimmer of the Big Gay Ice Cream stand. I indulged in a little chocolate and vanilla swirl soft serve which went surprisingly well with the cold weather.

Sunday, December 18, 2016
Location: Sonos Store (SoHo)
Event: Smorgasburg x Sonos Holiday Pop-Up
Food: Banana pudding

Magnolia Bakery taught us all to love banana pudding, but their $5 per spoonful price makes it a rare treat for me. Baonanas is a newer player on the scene that partnered with the Sonos store in SoHo to give their goods away for free. As is well documented, I'm very embarrassed about taking pictures of food in front of other people, so I went and sat on a stoop outside in 35 degree weather to photograph and eat my free pudding. Jude Law happened to walk by a few seconds later so my antisocial behavior paid off.